3 Lessons From a Former First Lady  

“Leadership works best when it comes from a positive, inclusive place. Be kind, be open, be human to each other. You will always win.” – Michelle Obama

Former First Lady Michelle Obama recently participated in a fireside chat conversation at a Social Summit in Austin, Texas recently. Mrs. Obama has a passion for the work she does, and she was delightful to listen to.

Politics aside, the most fascinating part is hearing her story. The lessons she has learned about being a woman in a man’s world were powerful and universal. The former First Lady shared observations in three key areas: digital communication and its effect on the world today, the motto of treating others as you want to be treated, and finally the idea of using your seat at the table to make change happen.

Digital Communication

The Obamas were the first family that had to deal significantly with social media in the White House. She candidly stated that this was something she and her husband, former President Barack Obama, had to learn over time. They had to figure out how they were going to use it themselves, not to mention the oversight and accountability they had to take with their two daughters.

The foundation of her approach to all digital communication is her team. She never does anything without them, and I’m sure many of us are like her in that regard. Her team ensures her communications are effective and appropriate, including always having three people read the communication prior to publishing. Imagine the blunders that could be avoided in our work place if we all lived by this rule. A team and its combined skills bring better debates, solutions and innovation to the table every time.

When Mrs. Obama speaks to a group, she always requires the inclusion of a local youth component, and this event was no different. This group included approximately 150 high school and university students from the Austin, Texas, community. She spoke about how social media is impacting youth and is making children grow up too fast. “Think before you post and always use the filter, ‘Would you say that out loud to the person’s face?’” That’s not just good advice for high school students, but for all of us.

Treat Others the Way You Want to be Treated

With a great deal of self-deprecation, Mrs. Obama explained that some people love her and others think she’s the devil. This garnered a few chuckles, but the extremes of how the right or the left react is nothing short of shocking. She asked the participants to consider, “How do you treat people? Do you treat others as you would like or expect to be treated?” She encouraged an empathetic approach, with kindness and openness in every facet of life. Why is it so widely accepted to be mean, to insult, to act out? We have an epidemic surrounding us today, even here in the workplace. You can control yourself, as well as coach your team, so that’s a good place to start.

Use Your Seat for Change

Mrs. Obama’s last lesson centered on two things: not giving up your seat at the table, and going further by using that seat for change. She did not hide the fact that there is stress in the country and many are frustrated. “Don’t give up. Speak up. Make room at the table for another that doesn’t look like everyone else.” How can you put this into practice where you sit at work? She took this to heart and was intentional about the legacy the Obamas wanted to leave at the White House, which was to make it a place more open and available to all people, all ages, all colors, all religions, all backgrounds. They chose to use their seat at the White House to welcome those who would not normally have the opportunity.

While her life experiences, skin color or political party may look different to some, the lessons and encouragements Mrs. Obama provides are applicable to all of us. Let’s remember and take action on the things that bring us together and make us better.