How Treating Others Well Helps You to Climb Ladders and Avoid Burning Bridges  

Networker. Mentor. Mama bear. These labels are all regularly used to describe me. I embrace them, because they all go back to one commonality: the value I put on relationships. In my opinion, no other mantra can have a bigger impact on shaping your personal and professional life than the Golden Rule–treat others the way you want to be treated.

The following concepts, all based on treating others well to build positive relationships, will help you to climb your professional ladders without burning bridges on the way up.

• The world is small. More and more, we realize how small the world really is. A year from now, you might work for a different employer, in a different city, or with a different team, but you will likely run into the same people. It’s important to maintain these relationships; they may help you get your foot on the next rung of the ladder. Oftentimes, who you know is the most important factor when advancing in a career. You’d be surprised which old connections might help you get there.

• What goes around comes around. One of the key pieces of advice I received from my parents while growing up was not to burn any bridges. I remember a time when I didn’t make first-string pitcher on my college softball team. I was angry and wanted to tell the coach why I thought his decision was wrong, which would have jeopardized my spot on the team. Instead, my dad reminded me that I shouldn’t do what might feel natural in that moment. There would be plenty of time to work hard and prove my coach wrong. I listened to my father and ended up getting as much playing time as one could hope for. From the softball field to the conference room, one overreaction can ruin a relationship or opportunity down the line. Never let your initial emotion become a barrier between you and what you’re trying to achieve.

• Take on new opportunities. Your relationships are going to bring you new opportunities. Challenge yourself to be fearless in pursuing them. For 20 years, I worked in my company’s communications department. Through a relationship (and delivering results and hard work!), I was given the opportunity to lead a business in a brand new department. Had I done anything like it before? No. Was it my expertise? No. Was I scared out of my mind? Heck, yes! But I trusted the relationships I had and the people who believed I could execute the new responsibilities. Without those relationships, I wouldn’t be celebrating five years in the job and the countless wins my team has had during that time. Be fearless, say yes, and see where your relationships will take you. 

• Relationships work both ways. Now for the hard part. These great relationships that get you in the door and in front of new opportunities don’t just happen by accident. You have to work to develop  them, sometimes for years at a time. My team and I have been able to successfully work at the highest level because we have consistently prioritized building relationships around the world. We think about what the other person in the relationship wants. We all know what we want to accomplish from a valuable relationship, but you also need to know what the others want to accomplish so you can collaborate in a way that meets everyone’s needs.  And, of course, communication is key.

• Be a matchmaker. You can’t always think only of yourself; you have to keep the big picture in mind. Whether it’s connecting like-minded colleagues at an industry conference or introducing new friends at a dinner party, it’s important to play matchmaker for friends, co-workers, and even strangers. People will remember you for it and look to you as someone who not only has real connections, but knows how to use them for the benefit of others. 

At the end of the day, your relationships define you and make you who you are. Never stop making the effort to seek new relationships. Keep your mind open to what these relationships can bring you, but keep working hard to strengthen your current relationships.  Don’t forget, when you climb the ladder to the next place, you need to take others up with you along the way.