The ABC to Creating New Opportunities in Your Life by Reaching Out and Making New Connections  

It all starts with a single “Hello.” (And no, I’m not talking about Adele’s 10-week chart topping, enormously addictive song “Hello.”) Rather, the mellow “Hello” we say to greet a familiar face, begin a new conversation or invite discussion and exploration. This two-syllable word can jump-start unknown opportunities and be the key to unlocking all closed doors. It’s the word I invite everyone to say a little more.

When I first arrived in the U.S. I did not have a single friend. So the word “Hello” quickly became my best verbal tool! Using all the ways to meet people, I put the salutation to the test: standing at traffic lights, waiting in supermarket check-out lines, or sitting on the subway, as well as in more conventional places like meeting someone at a bar or work conference. Every day I chose to dive into the sea of people — and possibilities — headfirst. I chose to actively involve myself in the present and be willing to make something of it. Day in, day out, I chose to say “Hello” to the world and those around me.

And do you know what happened? Strangely enough, people said “Hello” back. They reciprocated with a smile, and my fears of rejection or awkwardness were laid to rest again and again. Instead, more often than not, I would experience an overwhelming sense of joy, even excitement, at having made a new connection. Perhaps this person would be a new friend, colleague, gym partner, or mentor. Who knows? That’s precisely what made it exciting.

So, knowing how one thing leads to another, how friendships blossom and flower, we should always be looking to start a new conversation — to turn and say “Hello.” You never know who you’ll meet in that moment, what may come of it, and what you may learn. As the great Galileo said, “I have never met a man [or woman] so ignorant that I couldn’t learn something from him [or her].”

Despite this, many of us choose to ignore, or back away, from the possibilities standing in front of us everyday. We would rather be connected to our phones than connect with another human. We would rather tune into the world of social media than engage in truly social activities. This is a sad reality, made only more disturbing, when we actually look at the reasons for why we are checking our phones constantly:

• Mindless Eating + Boredom – In a survey conducted by Pew Research Centre of 3,042 cellphone users, “50% of people frequently or occasionally use their phone for no particular reason, just for something to do,” to pass the time. As Nir Eyal, author of Hooked, explores in his book, many products like Twitter, LinkedIn, Facebook, and Snapchat have all been designed to hook people in again and again — to make those desired behaviors of liking, sharing, and updating content, habitual. And as creatures of habit (or it could be argued, addicts!), we turn our attention from the surface and begin the downward spiral of never-ending clicks and scrolls.
• Explicitly Anti-Social Behavior – In the same survey by the Pew Research Centre, “Some 23% of cellphone owners say that when they are in public spaces, they use their phone to avoid interacting with others who are nearby at least on occasion.” Our phones have provided another means of shelter, a way for us to hide from the world but, in fact, we need to be brave and fearless instead. We need to step outside of our comfort zones, and the 6-inch screens.
• “FOMO” – Fear of Missing Out – Perhaps most alarming, and ironic, is that we choose to disengage and disconnect from our own world, because we fear what we’re missing out on in the world of social media. We’re stuck, focused on “‘keeping up with the Joneses” — or perhaps more accurately now, the Kardashians.

The Hopeful, Possibility-Engendering Power of “Hello”

All of this comes at a huge cost, in terms of our health and lost opportunities. It would seem, in this “always-on” digital age, we are suffering from a new health epidemic – a new form of obesity – namely, the overconsumption of social media, email and technology apps on our phone.

However, this is not a suggestion that you need to go on a crazy diet, right now, in which you challenge yourself to say “Hello” to every single person you see or walk by today and tomorrow — just so you can then go back to your usual “binge-eating” habits on social media!

Rather, my challenge to you is this: one time this week, only once, say “Hello” when you are waiting and standing in silence next to someone else. Perhaps when you’re grabbing that morning coffee or waiting for the bus. Don’t allow yourself to be controlled, zombie-like, by your phone. Be Awake, be Brave and be Creating your own meaningful experiences. In that sense, making the most of life and its endless opportunities can be as easy as “ABC.’’

Lastly, take a moment to recall a serendipitous encounter you had in the past. “What are the chances?” you quietly thought to yourself as you realized you just met someone who had attended the same school you did, or who gave you a tip that led you to a great new job. Consider this: the chances are real and much higher if you actually start the conversation.

And remember, “Hello” is just the beginning. It also a powerful metaphor for the new possibilities we choose to welcome and engage in. If only one person chooses to be more open, and aware of the need to be present in the moment, that in itself is success.