How Women Can Create Mutually Beneficial Relationships at Work  

Women have long battled for equal footing in the traditionally male-dominated corporate world. Now that the playing field is more level today, women should consider just how supportive they are toward their female and even male colleagues/acquaintances in the workplace. Many executives will acknowledge how competitive the business world can be, but have women truly improved the workplace or do they just perpetuate the norm?

According to many linguists, women have a more communal engagement style. They are inclusive and less competitive by nature, using the words “we” and “us” rather than “me” or “I.” Girls play in groups and share more organically, while guys tend to initiate activities that instill a sense of showmanship and victory. The same behaviors often arise in the workplace.  Men assume they always have a seat at the table and interject at random to make their points; women are hesitant to interrupt unless invited into the conversation, and they thrive more outside of the meeting rooms and seek more consensus – or so the theory goes.  Whether swimming with the sharks or communing with the dolphins, women can level the playing field and build better alignment and partnerships in the workplace. The workforce is filled with both genders, all ages, and people of vastly different nationalities, backgrounds and socioeconomic upbringings. Not knowing how to be effective in this mix can yield poor behaviors and is often the cause of fostering distrust and a “frenemy” environment.

What can a woman executive – high level or low level – do to improve the overall workplace atmosphere? Consider these five tips as a starting point.

1. Treat email sensitively. Until you understand the politics and intentions of others, you should always be cautious about sharing sensitive information.  Be wary of sending confidential emails and sharing information as knowledge is power, and it is often best to keep it to yourself. No one likes a gossip, and many times spreading rumors, even with good intentions, will reflect poorly on you. Instead, deflect negative communications and seek areas of agreement over conflict.

2. Deliver your ideas with honest intention, and build alignment before you escalate them to the next level. It is easy to get caught up in your own excitement when trying to influence an organization or management team, but it would be narrow minded to think that your ideas are always the best without including others and  building consensus. The value of a team is to get various viewpoints from different perspectives before implementing action or change. In anticipation of presenting newness, partner with both peers and subordinates to get all sides of a situation — issues, possible solutions or enhancements, impacts, and rewards. If you do your homework in advance, your ideas will be met with far greater support.

3. Don’t become obsessed with your own agenda. Never assume that only one agenda exists or should exist. The dynamic world of global business requires being nimble, getting along with all different personalities, and seeking common ground on priorities. Just because you disagree with someone does not necessarily mean one side is right or wrong. Chances are good that both parties are right and just need to help each other succeed. Businesses that thrive most are those that are built on collective respect that yields a single vision. Build internal allies and attack priorities together.

4. Be a role model. Most young executives would admit to wanting a mentor, someone from whom to seek advice, someone to help with career decisions, and someone who can guide them through the daily course of business.  Who would not want that type of support? Mentors do not have to be executives or senior-level people. Peers/colleagues, former employees, or organizational group members can be helpful allies. Don’t treat others like outsiders or potential competitors; instead, take advantage of their experiences and knowledge.  Become more inclusive, be open to feedback, ask others for their opinions, and, most importantly, be a role model and mentor yourself.  You will find that your good deeds will be returned with more good deeds.

5. Stay positive and assume the best. A CEO once said that he truly believed that how you feel and treat others is how they most likely feel about you and will treat you. Always try to approach things from an opportunistic stance and not a defensive one. If you start to play the corporate game with the singular goal of personal gain, your obvious motivations will be met with an equal or stronger force. It is far better to be wise and cautious than naïve and careless. As with anything in life, keep a pure heart, plan for all options, embrace change, and never take anything for granted.

Sadly, some people still think that to get ahead one must hold or push others back. This is simply not the case. Identifying colleagues as being at odds with you will have a self-prophesizing result. It is a far more rewarding experience to build partnerships, find agreement, support your peers, and set the right example.