Taking a More Empathetic Approach at Work Will Yield Better Results  

Step into any bookstore or airport drug store, and the choice of literature on leadership can max out your credit card within minutes. It is mind-blowing how much has been written on being a good manager compared to the number of actual good managers in business. How many people do you know who rave about how “amazing” their managers are? It is safe to assume that the percentage is less than 50%.

As someone who is on the “people” side of business, I want to share the key value that will lead to genuine respect, increased productivity and creativity, and trust from all your peers: empathy.

At first glance, this word may muster feelings of confusion, “What does empathy have to do with being a good manager or colleague?” Well, it has everything to do with it, in fact. Empathy is the ability to recognize and share the feelings of another human being. When you take the time to really “see” a person for who he or she is and beyond what you need of that person or what you need that person to be, you will open the door to find common ground and develop a solid relationship.

You have probably heard that “people don’t leave jobs, they leave bosses,” but if you dig deeper, that sentence is actually about feeling underutilized and not growing in a career. Harvard Business Review recently wrote an article on this topic, explaining why people really quit their jobs. Having a lens of empathy helps managers see employees for who they are and tap into their strengths in order to make the job enjoyable and be an asset to the team.

Each of us comes to the workplace with a unique lens and socially constructed identity made up of different backgrounds, insecurities, responsibilities, and dreams. Just scratching the surface of it with your peers and showing that you genuinely want to understand creates a safe space for trust and productivity. It also sheds light on how to best work with that person.

Data shows that diverse organizations have stronger bottom lines—by 33% in fact—but only when all employees feel respected and valued. Studies also show that teams that are healthy and have higher social intelligence are much more productive and enjoy a strong bottom line.

In addition to data, trust science.  Per the Neuroleadership Institute, every five nanoseconds, the brain processes questions like, “Is this fair?” “Am I being valued?” or “Am I being respected?” Thus, we are innately yearning for some sort of empathy. Knowing to tap into how workers are naturally thinking and what they are going through will help in yielding a return that is beneficial for everyone involved. As management guru Peter Drucker said, “Culture eats strategy for breakfast.”

The best career advice I ever received was to work on my active listening, which set me on a journey not only of validating my peers all the time but really listening with my eyes and ears to what is going on around me. This works both personally and professionally. One best practice I now exercise daily is to listen and pay attention to the “why,” to understand what people say and do, and appreciate the lens they are bringing to the conversation.

The critical component to prioritizing empathy as your core value is that it pushes you to work alongside your team and roll up your sleeves and ask the right questions, support the curiosity and the struggle on solving a problem, and moreover, believe in their success. This is true leadership and successful management. Remember, you are useless by yourself; it is your responsibility to ensure everyone feels seen and is working to their best capacity.

Author and strategist Simon Sinek believes that empathy is best expressed in just three simple words, “Is everything OK?” Empathetic leaders reach out with curiosity and not to command or harass an employee. They also are observant of energy on the team: Is my colleague coming in late a lot more lately? Is my colleague going to a lot of doctor appointments? Is my colleague stressed with work, or is something else going on? Why is my colleague pushing back on this approach? There are so many reasons and answers, and we have to be careful and not jump to conclusions or come down harshly.

Imagine the scenario if a colleague is late turning in a deliverable, and you stop by her desk and say, “I was about to grab coffee want to join me? How has everything been lately?” instead of “I need this by EOD today without any errors! No excuses!” Which approach do you think will yield a more forthcoming and honest answer and a better deliverable?

Trends today show that culture plays a key role in generating the best energy and productivity from workers and helps retain top talent. People join a company and team that speaks to their value system, not a culture they just tolerate. After all, they don’t leave jobs, they leave managers.

So now that you have read this, ask yourself if you are doing the best you can to connect with empathy with your peers. Perhaps pick up that book on empathy at the bookstore or airport next time and start making time.