Keys to Establishing Independence at any Stage of Your Life  

American Independence Day, July 4, comes and goes each year punctuated by parties, fireworks displays and random pronouncements about independence. Often, after the festivities are over, we shelve “independence” thoughts –American or otherwise– for another year. When did you last consider what independence is? What makes a woman independent? There are five key areas in which to celebrate your independence.

Financial Independence
Susan B. Anthony, who fought for women’s rights to own property, keep their income, and have the right to vote, said, “I think the girl who is able to earn her own living and pay her own way should be as happy as anybody on Earth. The sense of independence and security is very sweet.”

Simply put, financial independence means a woman earns what she needs to pay her bills. Financial independence affects so much more. Financially independent women feel less vulnerable and hopeless than do women who rely on a husband, their parents or someone else for support. When a woman doesn’t have to rely upon others for assistance, she calls her own shots in life, leaving her less vulnerable to the negative influences of others. Women that can earn a living also safeguard their family’s stability by not placing all the financial responsibility on her partner.

Thought Independence
“To find yourself, think for yourself,” philosopher Socrates advised. You may recall when you were a teenager that you thought independence meant you didn’t have to listen to your parents, your teachers, or your coach. You were only partially correct. Independence of thought means you posess the freedom to choose to follow the advice of other or to do things a completely different way. You can investigate many schools of thought on a subject and select the one that most closely matches your own, or you can think up something completely different.

Creative Independence
“Don’t be satisfied with stories, how things have gone with others. Unfold your own myth,” the poet, scholar and theologian, Rumi.

Where would we be without creative independence? If not for Hedy Lamarr, who before she became a screen actress was an inventor whose work was the precursor to modern cellular telephone systems, we might not have the ability to conduct business from our cellphones while travelling around the globe.  Mornings would not be the the same without our coffee, filtered to keep gritty grounds from ruining our ability to savor a smooth cup of Joe each day. For that, we owe Melitta Bentz, the German woman who developed a filter that allowed water to pass through to create a great cup of coffee while keeping the grounds from adding an annoying crunch.

Emotional Independence
Actress Katherine Hepburn once said, “I have not lived as a woman. I have lived as a man. I’ve just done what I damn well wanted to, and I’ve made enough money to support myself, and ain’t afraid of being alone.” Hepburn’s lack of fear of being alone could arguably be the most important element in her success. Emotional indepdendence means a person feels emotionally complete, grounded and happy with who they are and without the need for a stamp of approval from others. It means a person takes responsibility for their actions, the ones that yield successes as well as the ones that lead to failures.

Physical Independence
“Nothing outside you can give you any place… In yourself right now is all the place you’ve got,” wrote author Flannery O’Connor. Too many people equate their happiness with what they earn, what they own or where they live. They look outside themselves to discover their place in the world and consider their place of employment, their place in the company, the place they call home and their place in society. A woman’s physical independence, then, is the ability to live within her own body and feel complete wherever that self is.

Independence is freedom.  Live your life, your way, not under the control of people who might not understand your needs and interests as you do. Just as America asserted its independence on July 4, 1776 with a declaration stating it would no longer bow to the will of people across the pond that did not understand what the colonies desired, so women around the globe must declare their independence everyday. “The thing is to free one’s self: to let it find its dimensions, not be impeded.” –Virginia Woolf